Skip to main content

Small reminders as we go through life...


RIGHT SPEECH

There is a Chinese saying which carries the meaning that "A speech will either prosper or ruin a nation." Many relationships break off because of wrong speech. When a couple is too close with each other, we always forget mutual respect and courtesy. We may say anything without considering if it would hurt the other party.

A friend and her millionaire husband visited their construction site. A worker who wore a helmet saw her and shouted,"Hi, Emily! Remember me? We used to date in the secondary school." On the way home, her millionaire husband teased her, "Luckily you married me. Otherwise you will be the wife of a construction worker." She answered,"You should appreciate that you married me. Otherwise, he will be the millionaire and not you."

Frequently exchanging these remarks plants the seed for a bad relationship. It's like a broken egg - cannot be reversed.

NO OVERPOWERING

Many relationships fail because one party tries to overpower another, or demands too much. People in love tend to think that love will conquer all and their spouses will change the bad habits after marriage.

Actually, this is not the case. There is a Chinese saying which carries the meaning that "It is easier to reshape a mountain or a river than a person's character."

It is not easy to change. Thus, having high expectation on changing the spouse character will cause disappointment and unpleasantness.

It would be less painful to change ourselves and lower our expectations...

NO POINTING FINGERS

A man asked his father-in-law, "Many people praised you for a successful marriage. Could you please share with me your secret?"

The father-in-law answered in a smile, "Never criticize your wife for her shortcomings or when she does something wrong. Always bear in mind that because of her shortcomings and weaknesses, she could not find a better husband than you."

We all look forward to being loved and respected. Many people are afraid of losing face. Generally, when a person makes a mistake, he would look around to find a scapegoat to point the finger at. This is the start of a war. We should always remember that when we point one finger at a person, the other four fingers are pointing at ourselves.

If we forgive the others, others will ignore our mistake too.

TRUST

Trust is a very important factor for all relationships. When trust is broken, it is the end of the relationship. Lack of trust leads to suspicion, suspicion generates anger, anger causes enmity and enmity may result in separation.

A telephone operator told me that one day she received a phone call.

She answered, "Jabatan Kerja Raya." There was silence. She repeated, "JKR." There was still no answer. When she was going to cut off the line, she heard a lady's voice, "Oh, so this is JKR. Sorry, I got the number from my Husband's pocket but I do not know whose number it is."

Without mutual trust, just imagine what will happen to the couple if the telephone operator answered with just "hello" instead of "JKR".

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Migration Complete...

If you recall, sometime ago, I was toying with the idea of migrating to the wordpress platform. Today, that idea becomes a reality. The migration to wordpress is complete and all posts from today onwards will be at http://anakbrunei.org Do bear with me for the next couple of weeks while I figure out the ins and outs of wordpress hehe.

This site will remain visible for archive purposes. Thank you and see you over at the new pad!

Hadrah

... In the past, hadrah was only performed during weddings, but now it is performed in open events, to greet honoured guests and more significantly to signal the arrival of His Majesty in various events...

... Brunei youths nowadays have done well in preserving the heritage and have even enhanced it. Back then, competition involved only beating of drums and chanting. But now performances are choreographed to make it more attractive and interesting...

... hadrah could be further promoted in Brunei if there is a national association of hadrah set up. "We have a national team for silat and gasing (top spinning), but not for hadrah. We cannot just rely on mukim and schools to promote the activity, it has to be done at a national level...

-- The Brunei Times

Body scrub, Brunei Stylie...

Attended a friend's bedak mandi (pre-wedding ceremony which involves a blessing by close family elders and a cleansing body-scrub) ceremony this afternoon and it brought back memories of my own bedak mandi all those years ago. What fun, a free body scrub performed by several family members, watched by even more family members! More pics here.
Short rant:During the Microsoft Vista launch, both of us went in "business attire" as stated in the invitation. While trying to photograph the guest of honour, I was approached by one of the more seasoned photographers who asked me where I was from. I said I was an invited guest who happened to bring my camera.

This is what he said to me, "Mana baju kot mu? Kalau jemputan duduk saja. Kalau mau buleh pulang ku panggil AO ni untuk membawa kau keluar." Yes, very Bruneian indeed matey. You could have just told me that its a requirement for photographers to wear a suit in the presence of royalty. No need to bite my head off.

Lesso…